Bob VS Social Media – Full Disclosure and a Snake!

When I first landed on Social Media, I was smitten with the opportunity to reach 1000s of people with a few key strokes and hitting ‘enter’, or being able to have a conversation with someone without holding a phone to my ear by using Messenger to ask or answer a question without interrupting whatever I was working on for more than a few seconds.

Now, after 11 years on Facebook and a year or two before that on My Space (abandoned because it turned into a Flea Market for homemade jewelry, T-Shirts, and Indie CDs best left unrecorded), I have decided not to leave the declining and frustrating Facebook, but to treat it as it was originally intended…a way to pass the time with friends while waiting for the corn to pop, the water to boil, or The Beguine to Begin….

Before it became a Soapbox

Before it became Judge and Jury

Before the kids ran away to Snap Chat and Instagram because we’re so Goddamn BORING.

Before it became a festering pool of Opinion built on quicksand, posing as Fact, a place where Dead Horses can be beaten Forever, and a repository for the Worship of The Past that confuses Nostalgia with Taste, and Celebrity with Talent.

Phooey.

=0=

IN DEFENSE OF FACEBOOK

FACEBOOK IS FREE…

…and it is completely, easily, controlled by the User.

Don’t like the ads? Download an app that removes them.

Don’t like what some people say on your Timeline? Block them.

Don’t want to see dogs dragged behind cars or body parts strewn across a freeway? Report, Delete, and Block the offensive poster.

Learn to use “EDIT”. It’s not Facebook or Auto-correct’s fault we can’t spell, or forgot to add a link…click on “EDIT POST” and correct your mistakes.

DON’T PANIC!

Facebook serves over a BILLION users. They constantly do maintenance, upgrade, and repair their vast service 24 hours a day. It is not all done at once across the entire system, which is why our photos disappear at times, our ability to post or comment fails, we are unable to see certain friend’s posts, and a myriad of other problems.

The problems are usually brief and disappear within hours, or if it is something major, a matter of days. Those hiccups are a result of Facebook doing what must be done in order to assure its service performs as good as it can. It addresses these things regionally, which is why the problems don’t happen to everyone at the same time. Us complaining about every little problem does not help, is usually negative (we as a race LOVE placing blame on someone or someTHING) and serves no purpose whatsoever. Facebook is NOT trying to fuck with you.

Did I mention that Facebook is FUCKING FREE?

=0=

TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR TIMELINE

Up until recently, I was verrry liberal with what was said on my Timeline, but I have reached my tipping point, and like the tasty, BIG soft-eyed but dumb-as-a-Republican, Moo Cow, I have fallen over.

To wit…

To be honest, I am more FRUSTRATED than MAD, because EVERYTHING that’s fucked up is because of US. Either by ACTION or INACTION we have shit the bed, screwed the pooch, pissed in the punch and set the house on fire.

…yet all we do is Bitch and Bitch and Bitch some more.

The BITCHING won’t stop…so I, to a large degree, am going to stop MOST of it from cluttering up MY Timeline by being more attentive to what is being said and who is saying it.

Negative energy is TOXIC.

…and if you believe in Spirituality and the power of the MIND, HEART and SOUL, then if every complaint, dire prediction, and hopeless ‘I GIVE UP’ acceptance of the perceived futility of our current situation continues, the meaning of SELF FULLFILLING PROPHECY will become overwhelmingly apparent.

I, for one, am opposed to that.

=0=

FULL DISCLOSURE

Here’s where I stand at the moment.

Ask yourself where YOU stand….

POLITICS

We are standing in a room. In the middle of the room is an enormous pile of shit. It towers over everything else and is producing a vomit inducing stench that permeates everyone and everything in the room and beyond. All of us keep pointing at this ginourmous mound of excrement and talk about how much we hate it. How horrifying it is. How ungodly, and unhealthy, and inhuman it is. We complain to one another, even making up stories about it, even though its reality is almost beyond comprehension without embellishing its toxic, scarcely believable, existence. We ask ourselves, “How is this possible? How can this Godzilla-sized pile of crap even exist?” And loud, spiteful voices ring out from less than a third of the people in the room, and the voices people whose voices we hear speak of our stupidity, our inability to see the steaming pile of shit as our saviour, as a thing to be worshipped, as a God Given Leader that works in mysterious ways for the greater good, and how it has already spared us from certain death at the hands of an insane woman who steals from charities, runs a child sex-trade organization out of a pizza parlour, and whose private emails contain plans for the destruction of everything we hold dear.

We state our dismay. We repeat ourselves over and over and decry the insanity of having to live in this room with this immense pile of shit, which is now infested with parasites that both feed on and feed into this pulsating, toxic, vile, mountain of horror.

And while we point and protest, and call out for common sense and justice, it just sits there.

Still.

Just sitting there encroaching on the room, slowly filling it up, and yet, we do nothing.

We Can’t. We can’t even decide on a course of action…so we yell, and plead and bitch, and moan, and still, it sits there…unassailed, seemingly indestructible, while it’s mass, and its stench, spreads through the room and beyond.

In other words, take it outside. It’s boring and it’s going nowhere, and very few of us know enough to even comment let alone go on and on about it.

I get my information from a few places online and a few people on Facebook. The ones who do the research, verify their information, and share it with facts and figures to back up their opinions.

Roxanne (Mrs. Parker) Tellier is one of the best political analysts in the zeitgeist as far as I’m concerned, and I trust what she says, along with a few others.

But there is no more room on my Timeline for the circular arguments and unfunny memes that even I was responsible for in the past.

Then of course, there’s another Ford to consider….

Either agree to some sort of action to take these assholes down and get this pile of shit out of the room, or take the argument elsewhere.

I’ve had enough.

Who knows…maybe I’ll change my mind, but right now…no.

=0=

 MUSIC

Mick Dancing with an Albino Zebra on the Ron Wood Has a Hernia Tour 2012

If you have discovered something you think should be heard, by all means, let’s hear it.

If you want me to see a clip of Led Zeppelin or Paul McCartney, or Mick Jagger, or Pink Floyd or anyone who finally wore out their welcome on Q-107 performing one of their classics in Bombay in 1969,  or whatever, thanks, but no thanks. And, no…you have NOT seen all the great bands.

The majority of you haven’t even heard of most of them.

MOVIES

I know what I like and I know what I love, and popularity and celebrity don’t mean shit to me.

I should be at the opening of Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom, and I wish I was.

I LOVE 3D

I don’t care about great actors, I care about great stories.

I will not pay money to watch someone pretend to have cancer or AIDS or get hit by a car. Those things happen in real life and I HATE them. Why would I want to see someone pretend to suffer when there is so much suffering in the world?

I will, however, go out of my way to watch anything that DOESN’T happen in the real world (and pray that they never do).

Show me something I’ll never see, make me laugh my ass off, or engage me with originality, creativity, and passion. Otherwise, take your Oscar contenders and pretentious think pieces and drift away.

TELEVISION

It is a Golden Age of TV. There is so much quality, my head hurts with the weight of it all.

Goliath, Mrs. Maisel, Tales from the Tour Bus, and the Netflix Marvel and Stranger Things series, and other offerings from Amazon Prime, Hulu, Playstation and cable giants Cinemax, HBO, and Showtime, as well as guilty pleasures, Southern Charm, Below Deck, and House Hunters and Flip or Flop, Triple D, and Carnival Eats, and the animated shows, Archer, Bob’s Burgers, Rick and Morty, and Mike Tyson Mysteries… and what I’ve mentioned here is just the tip of the iceberg. There is truly something for everyone.

=0=

YOU

I love hearing about YOU.

Tell me what you LOVE, not what you HATE.

Make me laugh and I’ll try to do the same.

How are you?

What’s New?

What’s floating your boat these days?

Seen anything interesting or funny that isn’t all over the Newsfeed yet?

Life.

I’ll share mine if you share yours.

That’s what Facebook was intended to be.

That’s what it still is.

If you want it to be.

…and I have NO DOUBT that some of you will surprise me, ignore everything I just wrote, and dazzle me with your awesome cleverness.

I don’t expect any less from you….

BRING IT ON….

=0=

Any Questions or comments, please write them in the Comment Section below.

Your Comments Are Welcome

Segarini’s regular columns appear here whenever someone goes to Facebook Jail

dbawis-button7giphyBob “The Iceman” Segarini was in the bands The Family Tree, Roxy, The Wackers, The Dudes, and The Segarini Band and nominated for a Juno for production in 1978. He also hosted “Late Great Movies” on CITY TV, was a producer of Much Music, and an on-air personality on CHUM FM, Q107, SIRIUS Sat/Rad’s Iceberg 95, (now 85), and now publishes, edits, and writes for DBAWIS, continues to write music, make music, and record.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: