Pat Blythe – Celebrating music…..a little tongue in cheek……and music

DBAWIS summer hiatus is upon us…..August 10 to September 10. This will be my last column until September 15. Because of the timing of my column (Wednesdays) I will have almost six weeks off!! Time to enjoy the rest of the summer and focus on one or hundred other projects I have on the go.

There will be no summer festivals to regale you with when I’m back…..Mariposa was supposed to be celebrating their 60th anniversary and Summerfolk turned 45. Live music is slowly leaking out on front porches, parks, driveways, street corners and back decks…..speaking of which…..I have the pleasure of hosting a few “concerts” myself. I typically host a summer BBQ, with about 35-40 people in attendance, the third weekend in July. Not this year. Instead, to give musicians a platform to play to real humans, I offered my back deck and The Back Deck Concert Series was born. Maximum audience size…..10.

The Back Deck Concert Series featuring the BTBs – Ed Kopola/guitar, Bob Bilton/bass & Paul DeLong/drums

The BTBs performed on July 25 to a roaring success. Thanks to Ed Kopola, Bob Bilton and Paul DeLong, we all spent a fantastic Saturday afternoon listening to some amazing jazz for three hours. Folks brought libations and food and after the third set the BBQs were fired up. I have requested a monetary donation for the performers and everyone has been quite generous.

Eddie and Quincy Bullen and Paul DeLong will be entertaining us August 8, R&B/blues vocal powerhouse Quisha Wint and her band on August 15 and finally, on August 22, back again by popular demand…..the BTBs. I’ve decided to cap it at that as I wouldn’t mind a free weekend or two to myself. It’s a joy to host this little series and if weather permits and the bands still wanna, maybe put on one or two more concerts in September. We’ll see how it goes.

Are glory holes mainstream?

So…..what was once the perceived domain of the gay world, hidden in the shadows and frowned upon is now mainstream, even recommended by our hot and sexy Canadian government which is now officially on record for encouraging the use of…..wait for it…..glory holes (and no, they’re not referring to the doughnut shop in Toronto!!!) Our illustrious federal government is recommending glory holes for safe sex.  Now Magazine writes of masks and glory holes and wonders if this is the future of sex….and never mind “friends with benefits”. Now we have CWBs or “co-workers with benefits” or in some cases, “roommates with benefits”.  Be someone’s COVID sex buddy.

….only in Toronto…..pity…..

The New York City health department has released the Safer Sex and COVID-19 guide. Three pages of how to keep yourself safe, suggesting that YOU are your safest sex partner while proposing you keep those group sex dates to a small, more intimate gathering.

OMG, but I so desperately want to be the fly on the wall when these “guides” and “recommendations” are written. I think my favourite, “make it a little kinky. Be creative with sexual positions and physical barriers, like walls, that allow sexual contact while preventing close face to face contact.” The jokes…..the snorting…..the endless giggles… many cups of coffee (or alcoholic beverages) were inhaled or ejected out the nose? “A hole in one!” (guffaw). “Here, let me give you a tip.” (chortle). What I’m really trying to imagine is a glory hole for women? What the hell does that look like??? I’ll just leave that one there……………………………………….

The Western Australian Museum has recently acquired a large glory hole for display…..The pleasure receptacle is a wooden toilet door with a circle cut through at waist-level. It’s from a train station in the south-east of Perth, from a time when homosexuality was illegal in Western Australia.

A simple hole punched in a wall used purely for sexual pleasure…..anonymous, erotic, consensual, exhilarating, thrilling, pleasurable, titillating…..the adjectives are endless. Buzzfeed wondered if in fact glory holes had “gone mainstream” so they sent out an anonymous survey. They heard from gay men, straight men and even women. Why do people frequent glory holes?  Buzzfeed found “The need or desire for anonymity, the simplicity of sex without social interaction, the focus on pleasure, and the possibility for safe, consensual nonreciprocity were the most common responses about why glory holes endure as a kind of rare slice, or partition, of sexual utopia.”

I find this all very amusing, interesting and surprising since, other than money, sex is the next taboo subject. We don’t talk about threesomes, bath houses, brothels, oral sex and glory holes around the dinner table. We’d rather the earth just swallow us up. No one wants to go down that rabbit hole. (snort) Just the word “sex” is verboten and certainly not the typical high point of any discussion in any family’s table talks. The Sun in the U.K. has published a piece advocating glory holes for COVID-safe sex. Even the CDC has joined the conversation.  …..and the sales of sex toys just keeps rising. (I won’t even mention the “mouthful” joke…..)

No, I’m not jaded or even cynical…..just real…..and I do find a great deal of humour in all this. However, physical touching and all that goes with it is vital to the human species. It doesn’t matter whether it’s simply holding hands, a hug, a gentle touch on the cheek or a lunge into someone’s arms. We crave it. Sex, however you like yours served up, is part of it. So go on, find your kinky sweet spot and go for it!

Important developing news concerning the above. Verified by multiple trustworthy sources. Please follow this link and read before implementing any of the above. Thank You.

Relax – Frankie Goes to Hollywood

Flesh for Fantasy – Billy Idol

Hot Heels – Julian Taylor Band

Let’s Get It On – Marvin Gaye

I Touch Myself – Divinyls

Body Language – Queen

Feel Your Love – Julian Taylor Band

Fat Bottomed Girls – Queen

Small Town Boy – Paradise Lost

Enjoy the rest of your summer. Stay safe. Stay healthy. Stay in touch. See you in September.



Pat’s column appears every Wednesday.

Contact us at:

dbawis-button7“Music and photography….my heart, my passions.” After an extended absence —  33 years as a consultant and design specialist in the telecommunications industry — Pat has turned her focus back to the music scene. Immersing herself in the local club circuit, attending the many diverse music festivals, listening to some great music, photographing and writing once again, she is eager to spread the word about this great Music City of ours…..Toronto. Together for 34 years, Pat little-red-headed-dancing-girlalso worked alongside her late husband Christopher Blythe, The PictureTaker©, who, beginning in the early 70s, photographed much of the local talent (think Goddo, Frank Soda and the Imps, BB Gabor, the first Police Picnic, Buzzsaw, Hellfield, Shooter, The Segarini Band….) as well as national and international acts. Pat is currently making her way through 40 years of Chris’s archives, 20 of which are a photographic history of the local GTA music scene beginning in 1974. It continues to be a work in progress. Oh…..and she LOVES to dance! 

One Response to “Pat Blythe – Celebrating music…..a little tongue in cheek……and music”

  1. by a weird coincidence… found this comedy clip JUST before seeing your column.. 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: