Bob Explains Easter Yet Again While Mary Magdalene Spins Plates While Balancing on a Ball and Skipping Rope

Editor’s Note: An annual event for boys and girls who believe in rabbits laying eggs, Spiral Cut Ham, and dressing up for a parade. Originally posted in 2015 but with some minor changes, expect this column to run every year on Good (why is it good…everything is closed) Friday. Yay Jesus! …and pass the mashed potatoes.

It’s that time of year again.

Get out your traditional Chocolate Bunny Shot Glass and bottle of Easter Tequila, put on your Wooden Cross brand Easter Bunny Onesie, put the dog out, and lock the kids in the basement.

It’s time to get your Jesus on….

Roxanne Tellier: The Bare Necessities

I woke up in a great mood this morning. With reason – the last few days have been filled with music and food and friends and more good food. I’m a simple person.  My needs are few. Oh, I may grumble and stew and frown at times, but overall … I’m pretty much a human happy face emoji.

Roxanne Tellier – Don’t Mention The War!

If I made (or kept) New Year resolutions, I might have resolved to pay more attention to Canadian issues, and less to America’s or the rest of the world.

JAIMIE VERNON – DIVINITY INC.: (Chapter 1, Part 1)

During another life – say, 14 months ago – back when I had spare time and the ambition to write every single day I did more than crank out a biography, a book of my blogs, and two 400 page music Encyclopedias. I also wrote fiction. Or attempted to. I’m currently working on a batch of short stories in a sci-fi vein. I am also a big fan of satire – mostly British and specifically that of Douglas Adams. He wrote several of the funniest, most irreverent books about the absurdity of life on this planet in the “Hitchhiker’s Guide To the Galaxy” five-part trilogy.

JAIMIE VERNON – YOUR OWN PERSONAL JESUS

Happy Easter to everyone no matter how you celebrate it. If you’re a strictly by ‘The Book’ follower of the chronicles of Jesus than this is a weekend of mixed blessings (death, resurrection, Cadbury’s chocolate). If you’re a non-believer you too have a weekend of mixed blessings (in-laws, hockey playoffs, Cadbury’s chocolate).

JAIMIE VERNON – Life’s a Canadian Rock: Book 2, Chapter 4

Read Chapter 1 here: 

Read Chapter 2 here:

Read Chapter 3 here:

PHASE II, MACH III – PHOENIX RISING

Having spent the better part of 5 years taking my band Moving Targetz from a suburban Scarborough, Ontario basement (a trend later to be repeated by the Barenaked Ladies), burning up the Queen Street circuit, forming a record label and releasing not one, but two, 12” slabs of polyvinyl chloride only to have the band self-destruct on the eve of global domination, I did some soul searching and decided that I really didn’t want the musical ideology of Targetz to die.