A Quick Note from the Author….
This giddily insouciant and hopefully risible treatise was penned as I was unknowingly perched on the very precipice of falling gravely ill and nearly being shipped home from Italy in a pine box (which is only slightly less comfortable than Economy). That will be the subject of my next bravely jocular but tear-inducing column. Stay tuned, but keep those hankies at the ready.
This week Canada Post released a series of Original Series ‘Star Trek’ postage stamps featuring Captain Kirk, Spock, Bones and Scotty. Kirk, of course, was played by the human punchline and proudly Canadian William Shatner and his enemy in real life James Doohan, also Canadian, was Scotty.
Anyone who knows their movie history, knows that rant comes from Peter Finch’s newscaster/commentator character Howard Beale in the movie “Network”. Credit where credit is due. Those words actually were written by the author of “Network”, Paddy Chayefsky. Where am I going with this you may well ask? Well, see I LOVE A GOOD RANT! And that “Network” rant is one of the very best. There are plenty more out there. Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly trying to record a quick promo and not having the time…or Orson Welles losing his patience with a British director on a series of TV voice overs.
Not since Marlon Brando and his moo moo ate their way through Hollywood on the back of non-returnable advances for movies he did everything possible to avoid making has there been so many entertainment types hell bent on changing career paths by killing off their meal tickets.
Thursday it came to light that Canadian rapper Drake was being a social mediot by bad mouthing Rolling Stone magazine for bumping his cover story in favour of the late Philip Seymour Hoffman. News flash, Degrassi Boy: Hoffman has more cache dead than you will ever have alive. A simple “I’m disappointed in the turn of events, but understand Rolling Stone’s editorial decision. 
Respect PSH” would have sufficed. Instead, he show-boated. And like fellow rap asshat Kanye West, Drake will attempt to deflect now that people have taken to hating him more than they do already. He’ll mea culpa and return to his life shilling for the Toronto Raptors basketball team.
Bullseye Records of Canada
Segarini: Don't Believe a Word I Say 